Forty-four years of marriage has its own rhythm.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s seeing your husband and thinking, I know you.<\/em><\/p>\n It\u2019s finding value\u2014lots of it\u2014in difference.<\/p>\n It\u2019s laughing the easiest and the longest together.<\/p>\n It\u2019s knowing the ways that marriage is both less and more than you thought it was:<\/p>\n less score-keeping, less candlelight, less drama;<\/p>\n more small acts of kindness, more true<\/em>.<\/p>\n It\u2019s looking at your husband with the same kind of how lucky am I <\/em>awe.<\/p>\n It\u2019s holding hands, quick apologies, and forgotten compromises.<\/p>\n It\u2019s more listening and less talking.<\/p>\n It\u2019s feeling secure and sated in your marriage.<\/p>\n You realize there are more years behind you than there are ahead.<\/p>\n You accept certain vices\u2014talking to yourself, that chocolate addiction, your stubborn<\/p>\n streak\u2014as intractable.<\/p>\n You face the frailty of family and friends and come to terms with the truism that every<\/p>\n day on earth is a gift.<\/p>\n Forty-four years of marriage is:<\/p>\n well-worn routines,<\/p>\n remembering when<\/em>,<\/p>\n balancing comfort with skating on the edge,<\/p>\n having no more parents,<\/p>\n going to more funerals than weddings,<\/p>\n confidence in the Way You Do Things<\/p>\n yet aware how much is uncertain;<\/p>\n content with uncertainties,<\/p>\n comfortable letting it all hang out,<\/p>\n and forty-four years of marriage is a long pour of red wine after sundown.<\/p>\n It\u2019s waking at four a.m. to the contemplative quiet of early morning, before anyone.<\/p>\n It\u2019s imagining one more grandbaby, one more warm, soft baby against your slackening<\/p>\n skin\u2014and it\u2019s knowing that most things aren\u2019t about you.<\/p>\n Forty-four years of marriage is its own ephemeral incandescence, achingly bittersweet,<\/p>\n and vanishingly transient.<\/p>\n It is something to celebrate.<\/p>\n ~~~~~~~<\/p>\n Note\u2014A “found” poem: inspired by, and with thanks to Galit Breen\u2019s This Is 39<\/em>, Lindsey Mead\u2019s This is 38<\/em>, and Dina L. Relles\u2019 This is 35<\/em>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Forty-four years of marriage has its own rhythm. It\u2019s seeing your husband and thinking, I know you. It\u2019s finding value\u2014lots of it\u2014in difference. It\u2019s laughing the easiest and the longest together. It\u2019s knowing the ways that marriage is both less …<\/p>\n